Ever been to a high school reunion? When you walk through the hallowed corridors into the hall looking for familiar faces no matter how old you are an inexplicable sense of belonging seeps in. Once among the others your brain begins its comparisons… calculates what one’s success back during school has turned into in the present scenario. Does the girl who was considered the prettiest and made you wonder what went wrong with you, still have the same effect on people. Is the 90 percenter in a very high position at her job? That girl who failed most subjects; has she managed to get somewhere or have her parents just married her off like she believed? Wasn’t she the girl everyone ignored? Has she managed to make some friends?
It seems funny that somehow no matter how far along in life you are, in that moment you end up competing against that girl who always snatched that one extra mark and took the lead. You still look with envy towards the girl who won that one blessed competition. You continue to feel like the first runner up till you find out otherwise. That she probably hasn’t still made it big. But there’s hope. And while you judge others you take a pause to contemplate how your once-upon-a-time peers perceive you? Do they still think you’re a bitch? Are they still intimidated by you? Will they still think twice before talking to you?
Or have we all grown up and are ready to form new opinions about the people we have grown into? Here’s wishing…
You look around to find a familiar face; the girl you once called your “best-friend”. You haven’t kept in touch so you start talking to her. The conversation actually makes you question your taste. Or yourself… Your high school self. You bump into another one. The one you had terrible fights with. Your first response is if she’ll acknowledge you. Turns out she’s grown up and maybe its time you did too. Two minutes in the interaction and you realize what a myopic moron you had been. We have so much in common! The self obsessed one it turns out is working for an NGO. The dumb blonde achieved a scholarship. The fighter-cock has started conducting lectures on Karma. It’s all so absurd.
Then you find your friends in the corner. The ones that stood the test of time. The ones you call your soulmates (courtesy “Sex and the City”). Before you manage to lay you ass down they begin with all the information they’ve gathered… much the same as yours. Raised eyebrows complementing words like, “Can you believe this?” make for a collective examination. An analysis if you may, of where one stands. How “we” stand compared to the others. Are we still in the rat race or have we grown out of it?
While you mull over that you see the group of teachers standing by. Very few familiar faces, you notice. Among them you see the teacher who had once rebuked you for standing on the chair. The other one had slapped you for misspelling the word “corrections” when you submitted them... You dread meeting them, not because you think they may not remember you but because you’re scared they wouldn’t want to meet you. But it turns out teachers don’t forget their naughtiest students. They greet you with “happy dent white” smiles and acknowledge your presence. Those incidents apparently still make them smile. To them whatever you’ve achieved seems far more than what they ever expected of you. But the words “I knew you had it in you” spill out which makes you feel at least someone had trust in you.
Here’s the thing about high school reunions. You go for them knowing how judged you would be so it wouldn’t be that bad if you do the same to others. Some keep telling themselves they won’t let the bully get to them this time. Some go to prove a point. But all of us go to actually compare ourselves with us. All we want to know is whether we’ve managed to become the persons we once wished to be or have we become the persons we wished never to be. Another thing we all realize… high school defines nothing! It’s just growing up in a protected environment where your every move is scrutinized and bettered. In the real world you can’t get away with making mistakes… you pay dearly for them. No one is out there to teach you… you learn your lessons the hardest way. And most of all; no one gives a shit about your problems… if anything it makes most perceive their own better.
What stays are the fond memories of your alma mater, respect for your teachers, unconditional love for the friends you made then, who still stick around and the indisputable fact that you are a grown up and need to act like one.
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